Interview with Maria: a mother’s perspective on Gap Years in Italy

Taking a leap into the unknown is never easy—especially when it comes to sending your child halfway across the world. For Maria, the mother of Matt (from the US to Naples, Italy), watching her son embark on a gap year in Italy was both thrilling and challenging. Like many parents, she had her share of fears and doubts: Would he be safe? Would he adjust? Would this experience be worth it?

What she didn’t anticipate, however, was just how profoundly this journey would transform him. Through the ups and downs, Maria found reassurance in our support system, the warmth of the Italian community, and most importantly, in the incredible personal growth of her son. In this interview, she shares her perspective on the challenges, the emotional rollercoaster, and the unexpected joys of watching her child flourish abroad.

Hi Maria, can you share with us what inspired Matt to spend his gap year in Italy?

For Matt, this wasn’t just about academics—it was about finding himself. His college experience had been disrupted by COVID, and when he returned, he found himself drawn to music, particularly traditional Neapolitan songs. That passion deepened his interest in the Italian language and culture, and he started dreaming of spending time in Italy to perfect his skills.

His love for Italy has always been deeply rooted in family history. My parents were from Naples, and he grew up surrounded by their stories and language. In fact, he even took it upon himself to learn Neapolitan just so he could communicate with my mother before she passed away. That connection to his heritage played a huge role in his desire to return. Finally, during a family trip, he realized Naples felt like home. With our extended family just outside the city, he saw an opportunity to reconnect with his roots, immerse himself in the language, and experience life in a way he never could from a distance.

The moment he said, "I don’t want to go back, I need to find a way to stay," I knew this was something he was truly committed to. And when we found Italianforawhile, everything started to fall into place.

And how did you decide on Italianforawhile for his gap year?

When Matt expressed his wish to stay in Italy, we started researching programs. Italianforawhile stood out because of their personal approach. From the first call with Annetta, one of your gap year counselors, I felt supported. She walked us through every step, from finding accommodation to navigating the visa process.

Even when Matt’s visa was initially rejected due to a minor wording issue in the apartment documentation, Annetta quickly provided a revised letter. She also helped us prepare proof of his Italian proficiency when the consulate unexpectedly requested it. The 24/7 support reassured me that Matt wouldn’t be alone—not just in planning, but throughout his time in Naples. Even after he arrived, your team was there to help, from providing guidance on local bureaucracy to helping him explore his options.

Beyond the paperwork, the ongoing support made all the difference. When Matt encountered issues with his apartment, someone was there to assist. When he had questions about getting a residence permit or navigating the local academic system, there was always someone to guide him. Having that kind of backing gave me peace of mind knowing he wasn’t facing these challenges alone.

We know that gap years pose lots of challenges. What was the biggest one for you?

The logistics—visa, housing, paperwork—were manageable with the right guidance. But emotionally, letting go was the hardest part. The thought of my child living across an ocean was uncomfortable. I kept asking myself, Will he be okay? Will he make friends? What if something goes wrong?

At the same time, I knew that keeping him home out of fear wasn’t the answer. He needed to spread his wings, and I had to trust that we had given him the tools to do so. Letting go was a lesson for me too, as a parent. I had to accept that I wouldn’t always know exactly where he was or what he was doing, but I also had to trust that he would figure things out—just like I had raised him to.

One of the most difficult aspects was just that: knowing I couldn’t just step in and be there for thim the way I used to. But watching him handle challenges—whether it was dealing with Italian bureaucracy or even something as simple as learning how to live on his own—showed me how much he was growing.

We’re sure that Matt changed a lot since he first set foot in Naples. How did he grow as a person?

His transformation has been nothing short of incredible. Before leaving, Matt was reserved and spent a lot of time gaming. In Naples, he’s flourished—managing his own cooking, laundry, and daily life with a confidence I hadn’t seen before.

He’s built a social circle of friends from all over the world—roommates from Norway, friends from Germany, musicians who share his passion for the mandolin. But what made the experience even more special was the warmth of the local community. From the start, people were kind and open, making it easy for him to connect and feel at home. One mentor, a musician who had attended the local conservatory, has even been helping Matt prepare for entrance exams. And another musician he met in the city invited him to his home for a Sunday lunch and a jam session. These moments have shaped his experience in ways I never could have imagined.

His dedication to learning Italian even led him to take the B2 proficiency exam, and he’s now considering applying to a conservatory or pursuing language studies at an Italian university. With his residence permit secured, he has time to explore his options and decide what’s next.

The efficiency of Naples’ public transportation too has been a game changer. It allowed him to explore beyond the city limits with ease—embarking on day trips to marvel at ancient Pompeii, enjoy the Capri and Sorrento, and appreciate the splendor of Caserta. All these experiences have enriched his understanding of Italy’s beauty and history.

But more than anything, this experience has opened doors. Whether it’s music, languages, or something else entirely, Matt has gained the independence and confidence to carve his own path.

As for you, how did you handle the challenges of letting him go, and how do you stay connected?

Saying goodbye was one of the hardest moments of my life. But knowing he was stepping into an experience that would help him grow made it easier.

We talk on WhatsApp almost daily. Sometimes it’s a voice call, sometimes just messages, but it helps bridge the distance. The time difference can be tricky, but I always keep my phone nearby in case he needs me. And while I miss him terribly, I can see how happy he is. That makes it all worth it.

At the same time, I’ve learned to let go in a way I never had before. I don’t have constant updates on where he is or what he’s doing, but that’s part of the journey. He’s not just living abroad—he’s truly living. And that, as a parent, is what I ultimately wanted for him.

Last but not least, what would you say to other parents considering a similar gap year experience for their child?

Just trust the process. It’s natural to be nervous, but the growth, independence, and self-discovery your child will experience are priceless. There’s so much support available—not just from the program but from the local community as well.

You’re not just sending them abroad; you’re giving them the opportunity to step outside their comfort zone, build confidence, and create a future filled with new possibilities. Watching Matt navigate life in Italy has shown me that our children are often far more capable than we realize. They can adapt, thrive, and surprise us in the most wonderful ways.

As much as I miss Matt, I wouldn’t trade this experience for anything in the world!