GUIDES & TIPS

How to live with a host family? A guide for study abroad students

October 31, 2024

Studying abroad is an exciting adventure, full of new experiences, and one of the most impactful aspects is the opportunity to live with a host family. This living arrangement can significantly enhance your cultural immersion and provide you with a unique environment during your time abroad. But as exciting as it is, the idea of moving in with strangers in a foreign country can also be terrifying, and we understand it. This guide is here to help you navigate that experience, offering practical advice and insights into how to live with a host family successfully!

First of all, what is a host family?

A host family is a household that offers accommodation and, in many cases, meals to students studying abroad. This arrangement provides an authentic experience that goes beyond what you might get from staying in a dorm or private apartment. Host families can vary greatly—from traditional families with parents and children to single individuals or couples without kids. But, regardless of the family structure, the common factor is their willingness to open their homes and lives to international students, offering them a glimpse into their daily life and culture.

Living with a host family can be an incredible opportunity to learn about a new culture firsthand! It’s a chance to practice the local language in everyday situations, experience traditional customs, and build relationships that might last a lifetime. And in some cases, hosts with more than one available room may welcome multiple students, creating a shared experience that can enrich the cultural exchange even further!

A student living with a host family in Italy

So, is a homestay a good idea?

Choosing to stay with a host family is not just about finding a place to sleep; it’s about becoming part of a new community. It can be the experience of a lifetime but it can also feel too strict for people looking for complete freedom. So, is it the right choice for you?

The pros of living with a host family

  • Cultural immersion: there's no better way to immerse yourself in a culture than by living it daily. Host families offer insights into local customs, traditions, and ways of life that you wouldn't experience as a tourist or as a student living in a private apartment.
  • Language practice: living with native speakers provides you with constant opportunities to practice the language, helping you improve your skills faster than in a classroom setting.
  • Support system: your host family can be a crucial support network, especially if you’re feeling homesick or overwhelmed. They can help you navigate the challenges of living in a new country, be it a simple doubt about the transportation system or a more important cultural misunderstanding.

The cons of living with a host family

  • Less independence: unlike living in a dorm or a private apartment, staying with a host family might mean adhering to certain rules or schedules, which can feel restrictive if you’re used to having more freedom.
  • Cultural adjustments: adapting to a different way of life can be challenging. Differences in food, communication styles, and daily routines might take some getting used to.

Ultimately, living with a host family presents a unique set of pros and cons that can significantly shape your experience abroad. But, by approaching the experience with an open mind and a flexible attitude, you can maximize the benefits while effectively navigating any difficulties that arise, making your time with a host family both rewarding and memorable!

What is it like living with a host family?

Every host family experience is unique, and your own personal experience too will depend on various factors, including the family’s lifestyle, and your own expectations. However, here are some common aspects you can expect:

1. Cultural immersion

Living with a host family offers an unparalleled opportunity for cultural immersion. Instead of experiencing the culture from a tourist’s perspective, you’ll become part of the daily life of the local community. And this immersion extends beyond typical sightseeing, into the everyday rhythms and rituals that define a culture. 

Whether it’s participating in local customs, observing how holidays and traditions are celebrated, or engaging in daily routines, you will gain an understanding of the culture that goes far beyond what is accessible to a casual visitor. The interactions and relationships you build within the family will provide you with a window into the cultural norms, values, and social dynamics of the host country, allowing you to understand the culture deeply and personally.

2. Language practice

Staying with a host family can be one of the most effective ways to practice and improve your language skills. The constant exposure to the language in a natural setting allows you to pick up nuances, idioms, and expressions that aren’t typically taught in formal language classes. 

Your host family will soon become your first line of practice, where you can engage in daily conversations, ask questions, and get immediate feedback. And over time, this immersive practice will help you build confidence and fluency, making the language a more integral part of your life!

3. Building relationships

One of the most rewarding aspects of living with a host family is the opportunity to build strong, lasting relationships that often transcend the duration of your stay. As you share daily experiences, from casual conversations to significant cultural celebrations, your host family becomes more than just a place to stay—they become a vital part of your life abroad. 

This sense of connection fosters emotional support and creates a comforting sense of belonging, which is especially valuable when navigating the challenges of living in a new country. And over time, these relationships can develop into deep bonds that you’ll carry with you even long after your departure. 

4. Overcoming challenges

Living with a host family brings unique challenges, including adapting to varying levels of privacy, learning to follow household rules, and navigating cultural misunderstandings. These adjustments can sometimes lead to moments of frustration or discomfort, as you find yourself in a different environment from what you’re used to. However, these challenges also provide great opportunities for growth, teaching you important lessons in communication and cultural sensitivity. 

Learning to address issues directly and respectfully with your host family is key to maintaining a positive relationship, and it encourages a deeper understanding between you and your hosts. Over time, these experiences foster adaptability, patience, and empathy—qualities that not only enhance your time abroad but also become invaluable in other areas of your life. 

Group photo of a student and her host family

Our tips for living with a host family

Adjusting to life with a host family can be smooth if you start the relationship with the right approach. Here are some tips to help you make the most of the experience!

1. Communicate openly

Effective communication is key to a successful experience with your host family. From the very beginning, it’s important to be clear about your needs, expectations, and any concerns you might have, so don’t hesitate to ask questions if you’re unsure about something, whether it’s a household rule or a cultural practice. Being proactive in your communication will prevent misunderstandings and ensure that both you and your host family are on the same page. Remember: it’s better to address any issues calmly and respectfully as they arise rather than letting them build up, which could lead to unnecessary tension.

2. Be open-minded and respectful

Approaching your host family experience with an open mind and a respectful attitude is crucial for making the most of your stay. Every culture has its own set of norms and customs, and some of these may be different from what you’re used to; rather than judging these differences, try to understand and appreciate them. This openness will help you build a stronger relationship with your host family and deepen your cultural understanding.

3. Express gratitude and be polite

Simple acts of gratitude and politeness can go a long way in creating a positive atmosphere in your host family’s home. Regularly expressing thanks for their hospitality and keeping your living space tidy are ways to show your appreciation. At the same time, being considerate and respectful of their home and family members will not only make your stay more pleasant but also create a positive environment which will leave a lasting good impression. 

4. Manage expectations

Having realistic expectations can help you navigate your stay with a host family more smoothly. Even before landing in your new country, keep in mind that there may be challenges and that not every moment will be perfect. Flexibility and a positive attitude will help you handle any difficulties that arise, allowing you to focus on the many positives of the experience. Remember, the goal is not perfection but rather personal growth and cultural exchange.

5. Embrace the experience

Finally, fully embrace the experience of living with a host family. Take advantage of every opportunity to learn, whether it’s trying new foods, participating in cultural traditions, or simply spending time with your host family, and reflect on how these experiences are shaping your understanding of the world and yourself. By fully immersing yourself in the experience, you’ll gain insights and memories that will stay with you long after your stay has ended. And once you leave, maintaining contact with your host family can lead to a lifelong friendship, enriching your life with connections that span across borders.

Some questions to ask your host family

Asking the right questions right at the beginning of the experience can help you settle in more quickly and avoid potential issues. Here are some questions to consider:

  • Is there a curfew I have to respect?
    Understanding rules about curfews can help you manage your time and respect the household's routines. Like this you’ll be able to balance your social activities with the expectations of your host family, ensuring that you maintain a positive living arrangement and demonstrate your respect for their rules.
  • What meals are provided? What time are meals typically served?
    Knowing what meals are included and which ones you might need to prepare yourself is key to settling in smoothly. If some meals are indeed included, learning the times for them is crucial for coordinating your daily schedule and ensuring you don’t miss out on shared family moments. 
  • What’s the policy on having guests over?
    Clarifying the host family's policy on guests can help you avoid any awkward situations and ensure you’re following their expectations. Find out if there are any restrictions on the number or timing of visitors, and whether you need to inform your host family in advance.
  • Are there any specific house rules I should be aware of?
    Every household has its own set of rules, and understanding them is essential for a harmonious living arrangement. Ask about any rules regarding noise levels, use of shared spaces, or restrictions on certain activities. Being aware of these guidelines will help you adapt to your new environment and avoid potential conflicts with your host family.
  • How can I help around the house?
    Offering to assist with household chores demonstrates your appreciation for your host family's hospitality and willingness to contribute to the household. Ask about the chores you can help with, whether it’s setting the table, doing the dishes, or taking out the trash. This proactive approach will help you build a positive relationship and show that you’re a considerate guest.
  • What’s the best way to communicate if I have an issue?
    Effective communication is key to resolving any issues that may arise during your stay. Ask your host family how they prefer to handle concerns or conflicts, whether through direct conversations or another method. Understanding their preferred communication style will help you address any problems calmly and respectfully, ensuring a smooth and positive experience for everyone involved.
A family and their host student having aperitivo together

Should you bring a gift to your host family?

Bringing a small gift for your host family is a thoughtful gesture that can help break the ice and show your appreciation. The gift doesn’t have to be expensive—something from your home country, like local snacks, a small souvenir, or a handmade item, can be a great choice. The key is to choose something that represents where you’re from and can serve as a conversation starter.

If you’re unsure what to bring, consider something that the whole family can enjoy together, like a game or a special treat. This small token of appreciation can set a positive tone for your stay and help you start building a relationship with your host family!

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